The Kush (post rated NC-17)

NOTE: If you are highly conservative, around children, or happen to be my brother...you may want to skip this one. Boobs are involved. Consider yourself warned.

...

...

Still here? Excellent. Let's talk boobs, and one of the problems associated with having a pair that are, for lack of a better word, full. The problem is when I lay on my side. If I'm truly on my side, the top boob is in a tough spot. Not only is gravity pulling it down, but the one on the bottom beckons to it like a nice soft pillow, "come on down here and rest your weary self!" However, top boob is not graceful. Top boob can't just lay down and be quiet, all out of the way and whatnot. Noooooo...top boob has to lay down and shift forward, towards my upper chest. This makes it very uncomfortable for sleeping, as the line of my cleavage creeps up towards my neck. In the past, I used to address the issue by either rolling more onto my back, or by sort of balling up the comforter in between the pair. None of my problem solving ideas were ideal, though...I really do like sleeping on my side, and the comforter always came out. For visual reference, this is what the smush effect looks like (last warning to family and conservatives to look away):

Obviously you're not seeing the FULL effect, but if you're seeing it right your breathing should feel slightly restricted like mine was.

Now let's also talk about my affliction for buying things I see on TV. Sure, I could go down to Walgreens and buy the same $9.99 item minus the $57 shipping and handling fees, but what is the fun in that?

Enter the Kush. I think I first saw it in the back of a magazine, and thought it looked ridiculously phallic but yet there it was, promising to fix the exact problem I was having!! Here is a picture of the little monster (I know...I know):

I ordered it, and 6-8 weeks later it showed up. I thought it strange that the material was cold, hard plastic. Not very comfortable to think about, as I had imagined it to be hard foam or something. (Upon further research, the website does say that it is made out of foam...wtf?)

However, since it's being nestled in between two soft, warm things...it works out rather well. The plastic keeps it from shifting around, and it doesn't get too hot. I don't use it every night or when I'm sleeping around other people (it's kind of a like a retainer)...but when I do? Sweet, supportive relief. Annnnd, since I would never leave you hanging, here's the after (sorry for the poor picture quality, it was either that or nipple):

So, now that we've gone there and done that, here's to a fun and exciting Memorial Day weekend!