Rrrrrralph

My morning in bullets:

• Woke up, showered, got ready per usual
• Took my multivitamin with water, and not V8 per usual (this is a MAJOR bullet point)
• Got in my car to leave, and realized I needed gas so took the back roads
• Traveled about 1 mile from my house before realizing that I was 100% going to puke (cue memory of multivitamin with water on an empty stomach)
• Tried to turn around while getting the full drools and frantically whispering to myself “ohmygod…I’m not going to make it”
• Did NOT make it. Stopped the car, opened the door and ralphed all over the street
• CUE HUMILIATION: woman drove by going in the opposite direction having seen the whole thing and stopped in the middle of the road to see if I was okay
• I didn’t think she wanted my whole V8/multivitamin explanation, so I gave her a feeble smile and said the first thing I could think of: “I’m fine…I’m just pregnant” (I am NOT pregnant)
• Woman gives me knowing smile and starts to say something understanding along the lines of “Oh I remember those days…”
• I didn’t wait for her to finish, just said “Yup, thanks!”, shut my car door and drove home to rebrush teeth, etc.

Gross. Sorry if you’re eating breakfast right now.