Things that make me giggle

It's very simple to make me laugh (too simple?) and I credit my abundance of laughter for my good skin and beautiful feet (trying to make you laugh, too). Here's a quick list of things that never fail to produce glee--whether it's a quick giggle or a full out guffaw...

Phrases:

"Needles is to say". At a previous job of mine, a French guy sent out a company-wide email regarding the birth of someone's new baby. At the end of the email, rather than writing "needless to say", he wrote, "Needles is to say, mother and baby are doing fine." I always say 'needles is to say' now.

"Ex-squeeze me?" It's juvenile, it's old, and it's stupid, but for me it's timeless and funny every time.

"Jighter fet" This comes from watching the news one night and the newscaster said "an F-16 jighter fet", and then immediately corrected himself to say "fighter jet". Those things are funny on youtube, but even funnier when you see them live.

"Untie the face" One of things I inherited from the lovely Noella (well, most of the Vienneau clan actually) is my inability to mask my emotions as displayed by my facial expressions. If I think it, you see it. My cousin (and future co-background dancer, see story below) Connie said to me one night, "Tammy, untie the face." It stuck, and is often repeated to me by my mom and Ryan.

Things:

Anyone tripping (not falling, just tripping). If someone falls it elicits more of a fear response in me, but a simple trip or stumble is what really gets me going. I would like to clarify that my laughter escalates to the "piss my pants" level when I get to witness that split second expression of fear that registers on the face of any adult who stumbles. If someone also throws in a "watch your step" after the person trips, it's all over.

Unintentional farts. The coughing fart (POW!), the laughing fart (pfh pfh pfh), the bending fart (tweeeet), or even the elderly-driven walking fart (poot-poot-poot-poot). All funny. Perhaps the funniest of all is the church fart. 'Nuff said.

Guilty-looking dogs: Something about the shifty eyes and sideways glances gets me. Particularly effective from dogs with buggy eyes.

Me falling (not tripping, but full-out falling). I think it's only funny to me when I fall because I know I'm okay, whereas when someone else full-out falls down I worry about their safety (I'm not a complete a-hole). For example, the last time my friend Christina from North Carolina showed up at my house it was 11:30 at night and I was half in the bag. I was so surprised to see her that I jumped up from the couch, screamed "CHRISTEEEEENAAAAAA!!!!" and tried to run around the coffee table to get out of the living room. Bare feet + a slippery floor + a sharp turn= total YARD SALE for Tammy. One of those fast, loud, slapping down on the floor so hard falls that is still making me roar with silent laughter even as I write this. Should also mention that 4 other lucky people got to witness this hilarity.

Tina Turner: This one is all about my HILARIOUS Canadian cousins. Started with me and Connie watching Glen and Wayne play at the Legion in Minto. Band begins to play Proud Mary. Connie and Tammy begin to sync our movements in an awkward drunken dance routine. Connie notes that if Tina Turner could see us she would probably want us to go on tour with her. Tammy goes on to specify the conversation Tina Turner would have with us, which would simply be, "You two. Wardrobe. Now." Connie and Tammy start pantomiming (still in the bar) all of the self-beautification routines required for our impending tour with Tina Turner, starting simply with applying lipstick and quickly snowballing to shaving the pits, plucking stray nipple hairs and Connie with her leg up over her head "grooming" with a fake razor. The whole story came to a full circle later that weekend when Connie and I were retelling the story and Glen got up to do his Tina Turner impression. I will have to get it on video because I do not feel capable of putting it into words. Okay, maybe a few words. Knock-kneed, intense, and lisping.

Laurie's laugh. Part of the reason Laurie is my best friend in the world is her ability to make me laugh, no matter how pissed/sad/stressed I am, with a simple giggle of her own. It truly is the best therapy. It has single-handedly prevented thousands of fights.

Ryan's expression when Lola sits on my face in bed: Lola (my cat) is the biggest pain in the ass. Ever. I have become so used to her making her subtle sneaky moves up to my pillow while I'm sleeping and eventually morphing her fat ass onto my head that I forget how ridiculous I am for letting her do it. Until last week, when I was half-asleep and quietly enduring her endless shifting to make sure she's effectively covering up every single orafice I use to breathe. At one point she was fully straddling my neck with her back legs while her front arms were on my forehead, as if I were a giant pony for her to ride. She finally (FINALLY) got up and moved somewhere else and I just happened to open my eyes to see Ryan silently watching the events and shaking his head with the best look of absolute disgust I've ever seen. I was embarrassed, yes, but I haven't laughed that hard for a long time.

Those are just a few things I can come up with for now, although that's really just the tip of the iceburg.